Net Neutrality

Neutrality on the net. Such a hot topic and understandably so. I remember my first website on the net. It was 1997 or 98 and I set it up for my hairstyling business. Sank a lot of my money into it, think it got me one client in the salon in total. Fast forward to now, my Facebook page, website and Linked in bring me a lot of business and keep me visual on the net. My small hair and make-up business gets views, comments and ultimately, business. I imagine with the loss of net neutrality, this may not be the case. 

It irks me to have my Internet experience turned into the same as my television experience. The net was where I used to get away from advertising and the word of the big brother companies. It used to be a place where I could research and discover all kinds of weird and wonderful facts and watch skydiving videos free of advertisements. Not so now. Those pesky ads are everywhere, and I have to wait five seconds to close them. The end of net neutrality would further exasperate this issue. Not only will I have to endure those pesky advertisements, but the net would no longer be my personal experience. I would be stuck watching what those rich corporations want me watching or searching, or wait forever for the things that really interest me to download. This would effectively change the whole face of the Internet. No more freedom of speech or eclectic choices. Just cardboard cut-out, here's what the rich people want you to see, boredom. 

Net neutrality isn't all about me, though that is how I ponder it. It's about freedom of speech and freedom of press, and freedom of expression. It's the last place that Americans can truly discover like-minded individuals, interests and pass times. Advertisers and big corporations don't decide what's posted. Everyone with something to say can have a voice. Ending that would be catastrophic to the last vestiges of democracy the American public so dearly clings to. Things could be hidden, buy buy buy would replace tiny blogs, fun free videos and remote tiny eclectic websites. 

The biggest danger of losing net neutrality is the monopoly afforded to large corporations over small mom and pop businesses. The big guys would always come first and the little guys would be lost in oblivion. This cuts off a tool that these small businesses have come to depend upon for visibility. Allowing these giants to edge out small business would be catastrophic. Many small businesses would suffer and could eventually close. 

I'm sure the ISP providers would be against net neutrality. Imagine the money they could make! Huge corporations knocking at their doors offering thousands, they wouldn't even have to charge a lot to their customers, the corporations would pay for it. You may read this and think yeah, free Internet. No the Internet would no longer be free. You could get it for nothing, but you always get what you pay for. 

President Obama has the right idea when it comes to net neutrality. Let's leave the last truly free place on this planet be. 

Blackfish

The short animation, The Orca Awareness Project reminds me of when I lived in Niagara Falls. I can still hear the jingle for Marineland, as the commercial played on the television screen. Though Marineland has been a successful business for years in that vicinity, many of us were well aware that keeping animals such as whales and dolphins in captivity was just plain wrong. We also heard many stories coming out of the park about the mistreatment of the animals. Peta has the park in its radar now as well.

It is important that art focuses on important and relevant issues. It engages the viewer and asks them to question the way things are. I firmly believe that projects like the Orca Awareness Project are relevant and important. We humans are mammals just as the whales. They have the capacity to think and feel just as we do. It is important that message is conveyed to the people who would frequent these types of establishments if they were not made aware of the cruelty of their existence. 

When I look upon the things that we humans do to other beings, it astounds me that we have so little love, empathy and compassion within us. At what point in history did man stand up and say, I matter, what I want matters and it does not matter who or what suffers, so long as I get what I want? When did we collectively decide that we were more important than any other living being on this planet?

We are at a tipping point in history. Not only are we collectively becoming aware of the cruelty of our actions in regards to other beings, but we are also taking notice and action on a level not seen before. The Internet has made us aware of what is happening all over the planet in regards to animal cruelty and the damage to the environment. Almost twenty years of the Internet feeding us this information. When are we going to collectively get off our asses and actually do something about it? 

I see the beginning, people who dedicate their lives to helping others. Souls who are now mindfully taking into consideration the effects of their personal carbon footprint. Animal activists are all over my Facebook newsfeed. We are beginning to stir, but we have to move faster. How much have we already lost, and how much will we lose before we make the significant changes necessary to actually live in harmony with the birds and the bees and our fellow man? 

Here I sit writing about these issues. I'm sitting, doing nothing, but making marks upon the Internet for others too see. I'm not doing anything effective. It is time to start planning a life that lives in harmony and stop planning a life that just follows the destructive path of those before. The most important part is to move from the plan to action. It’s time to get off my ass and start making marks that actually matter. 

In Regards to "The Great Fragmentation".

Jon Evans in his article The great Fragmentation, explores some interesting ideas concerning individuality and micro communities forming across the Internet. In an interesting passage he comments on his beliefs that this fragmenting of the mainstream is a positive turn of events, 

"A society in which people accept that their personal views generally are and will remain minority perspectives, rather than seeking to impose “normal” beliefs and tastes on any who don’t fit in, is enormously healthier, both culturally and politically. Given time, maybe this social transformation could even fragment American politics beyond its infantile two-party divide, into a genuine three-or-more-party democracy like the rest of the West enjoys".

I agree with Evans wholeheartedly. A large group of people with the exact same ideals and beliefs is not only unhealthy, but also dangerous. One can look to history for examples of the destruction groupthink has wreaked on mankind. From the Crusades to Isis, and multiple evils in between. 

Every individual human being is born with a distinct personality with distinct gifts and attributes. Through the combination of nature and nurture we evolve into adults with individual beliefs, ideals and interests. It is this individuality that has brought about some of the greatest inventions of mankind. We would not be flying if it wasn't for the nutcase Wright brothers. If Tesla was forced to fit into the mainstream, well he'd have been locked up in an insane asylum. Setting aside individuality and personal interests to be part of a norm essentially cuts the individual off from their personal interests and ideas. There is a reason "thinking out of the box" became such a popular saying during the 90's. With the dawn of the Internet, society as a whole, realized that fitting in did not instigate change or development. 

The Crusades are probably the best example of the death and destruction that is caused by groupthink. Be it religion, political, or moral beliefs and ideals when large groups of people come together and damn all those who do not think or act or believe as they do insanity ensues. As Evans pointed out, the two party system in the US is a great example of this insanity as well. 

When individuals reach out to others with similar beliefs and they foster many different ideas and beliefs this creates an eclectic web of connections. Sam likes skydiving, photography and scuba diving; she is a libertarian with personal spiritual beliefs she chooses to ponder alone. Ben is a conservative Christian, who also likes skydiving and photography. Sam and Ben form a friendship and affinity through their shared interests, and allow each to pursue their religious and political beliefs on their own. This is how man can transcend the hate. 

It has always been my personal belief that live and let live is the ideal way to approach life. Though it is important to ensure that lives are not lost or harmed while pursuing individuality, I honestly believe that it is how life should be approached. 

Common Sense, a Logical Fallacy.

In Chris Jordan’s short video, “Midway a Message From the Gyre”, the creator asks his audience a powerful question,

“Do we have the courage to face the realities of our time and allow ourselves to feel deeply enough that it transforms us and our future?”

A powerful question to all of mankind. With his challenge to us all to become courageous and bring about change within our society, and ourselves to stop needless death from our senseless waste, he leaves his viewers steeped in introspection.

One is left questioning the ways that they can be courageous to help bring about change, for myself, I continue to wonder how it is even possible to stem the tide of destruction unleashed by mankind, not only upon the environment and animals of the world, but on members of our own race. We are disgusting animals; as demonstrated by many environmental catastrophes, but the Pacific Garbage Patch is probably amongst the most ugly and deadly examples.

Change needs courage. I know courage well, as you see, I have no common sense, or rather my common sense makes no sense to others. Courage is having your own sense, nothing common about it. You take a look at the way things are and make a decision to not abide it. It begins first within you. You accept your mistakes in the past, and then you look at how those mistakes have contributed to what is happening. Then the hardest and most courageous part begins. You make the changes in yourself.

Real change requires small steps, with a lot of courage. First you stop yourself from contributing actions and attitudes. You stop blaming and hating yourself and others as well. You begin to forgive. Once the self and others are forgiven, then you can move forward to the most difficult steps to change, speaking and acting from the centre of your personal change within.

Though much of my life could have been worse, as I could have been born in Africa starving with aids, my life has not been a bowl of cherries either. Early childhood molestation, physical, mental, emotional abuse, bullying, rape and the subsequent wrestling I've had to do with myself to not allow that damaged child within to run my life. A battle that I have had mild degrees of success with as I am not hiding from my pain and shame within a narcotic induced haze nor at the bottom of a bottle or wine glass. Though I did try to do exactly that many times, the sense within me demanded I rise above. So I did.

I began to speak. Many would argue that common sense dictates you don’t publicly speak of these issues. Well I disagree. My sense says we should all be speaking about these issues. If they weren’t hushed and shoved under the carpet, and victims of sexual and mental abuse publicly discussed the issues, this kind of behavior would be much less rampant in our society than it is today. Society would make changes and become much more understanding. Social pressures would force change upon perpetrators and take the onus off of the victims. The victims of these crimes would be given a fairer shake if they were allowed to speak without fear of being blamed, or labeled crazy. I can assure you that if you have experienced the effects of any kind of abuse, you would know,  the mental aerobics required to overcome the effects in your personality are exhausting, and can contribute to making you vulnerable to further abusive situations.

So you see, I have no common sense. I do, however have a sense of myself and what I believe to be right and wrong and I will continue to discuss these issues openly because I want to make changes. I want to take away a child’s pain before it begins, before they end up in a drug induced coma, before the alcohol kills them, before society labels them crazy and unstable, before they have to lose their common sense.

"The Broads Must be Crazy"

I'm still laughing. John Stewart's skit comparing and contrasting the fallacies surrounding women's and men's emotion in politics is hilarious. His customary satirical political jibes work well to convey his underlying message. The double standard in society about emotions and sex. Women are emotional and unpredictable; men are just overwhelmed or showing strength when they show their emotions. His example's using Hilary Clinton, contrasted with a few governors then the news reports on each instance are exemplary. Time after time we see reporters defending men's show of emotion and reporters damning women showing emotion. I like how John leaves you wondering, why the hell this double standard exists.

I grew up surrounded by narcissistic men. My father, and in turn, my younger brother. Anytime I did well or commanded too much attention for something I did well, they played the crazy card on me. My brother would throw my fish out the window and point out that my crying and carrying on over a fish was crazy. My father would intentionally lie about my curfew time. He'd lose his temper on me when I arrived home on time for my 10pm curfew, he'd say it was supposed to be 9pm. then chase me up to my room scaring me so bad I pissed myself in the corner. I don't know where they learned it, but these men understood one thing. You can dominate a woman and even control her, by convincing her she's crazy. Most of my life I've believed I'm nuts and dumb. I've even acted crazy and stupid because it was drilled into me as a child. They are right though; convincing a woman that her emotions, thoughts and ideas are crazy DOES control her and keep her in line. It forces her to squelch her identity to try to be normal. 

One of the strongest tools men have over women is the chemical instability inherent in a women's body due to the gift of reproductive organs. Yes women are more prone to mood swings as the hormonal and chemical changes a woman's body goes through every month, are incredible. Some women are affected more than others, but here is where the power trip lies. Men are aware that these changes predispose women to hormonal fluctuations so it is easy to pin any and all negativity within a relationship upon the woman. A healthy woman is even more vulnerable as she is constantly monitoring her mood changes. Feedback from the men she trusts in her life, telling her she is crazy, leads her to believe the same thing. Then begins the feedback loop, maintaining that the woman is crazy so the man maintains control.

What is interesting is that men have mood swings too; though there isn't as strong a case to explain these mood changes away as a regular monthly occurrence. This lack of physical and chemical evidence, strengthens the case that women are the ones with the serious mood swing problems. Maybe the fact that men often have mood swings without any physical or chemical explanation could be used as an argument that men with mood swings are the crazy ones?

Mood swings occur in women and men and men are just as likely to have outbursts of anger or crying as women.  Using a woman's reproductive system as a scapegoat, many, even other women, try to peg women as unstable. This leaves behind a cultural fallacy. When women lose it, it's her hormones and not based in any way on circumstances in her environment whereas, when a man loses it, he's simply reacting logically to circumstances in his environment. On this I call bullshit. It’s time to stop forcing women to accept that they are "unstable". Men and women are equally gifted with the ability to blow their stack. It's called being a human being. 

Addiction?

For my English 102 class I was asked to read an article named In Defense of Slow Reading by Paul M. Davis. At the beginning of his article, Paul likens himself to an addict using his former smoking habit and his Internet activities as an example. This made me wonder about the word addiction. I've always thought there were good addictions and bad addictions, but is any addiction really good? The quote by Oscar Wilde comes to mind, "Everything in moderation, including moderation".

I'm a smoker. A disgusting, smelly, lurk in the back alley so my clients don't see me smoking, pack a day, smoker. Smoking for me, is an emotional crutch. Anytime I feel overwhelmed, frightened, angry, sad, nervous, anxious, or just need to stop for a minute, I light up another stick. I know this causes cancer, I even announce to my colleagues that I'm heading out to "beg for cancer", when I head out to lurk in the back alley to puff away. By Mr. Davis' definition, I'm a full-on addict. 

To me an addict is something much more sinister than a mere smoker or Internet junky. To me an addict is more than self-destructive; they are like a bomb that goes off in every relationship they are a part of. Even stopping the behavior or substance they are addicted to doesn't stop them from finding a new insidious addiction to destroy the lives of themselves and everyone around them. I know because I have family members who are addicts, and trust me, they don't need to drink or do drugs to decimate their loved ones. Recovering addicts often replace their drug, alcohol, or insert whatever, addiction with control, manipulation, theft, lies, and abuse. I've experienced it first hand, on many occasions. A good friend recently made a comment about smokers hiking the cost of her health insurance. Maybe my self-destructive habit isn't as "self" destructive as I had thought. 

So I have begun to question, why do we become addicted to anything in the first place? Why do we as humans, with this incredibly diverse planet, with so many diverse distractions, get addicted to doing one thing over and over again? Why do we get caught in a loop? I mean there are a million things I could find to do to relieve my tensions and take a break, that don't involve destroying my lungs or hiking up insurance rates. All of the addicted souls I know, who continue to push the same destructive buttons to get where? 

Is it our "Lizard Brain", as described by Dr. Joseph Truncate? Or does the prevalence of addictive behavior in our society point to even bigger problems with the way our society is built?

Apparently this is still under debate by psychologists associated with Psychology Today. Their article on addiction is interesting, but poses even more questions as to the why's of it. This mysterious, sometimes life threatening, pattern of behavior called addiction. 

I do believe it's time for a cigarette.

In Regard to Touchstones

“Formation is journeying, individually and in community, to our inner selves, our hearts and souls, to identify our true selves and our deep integrity. From this center proceeds our action.”

—Parker J. Palmer

Sue Jones and her writings of Touchstones , affects me rather deeply. As a loner, I accomplish more and achieve at a higher level when by myself. Just having one other person within a room with me, without them even speaking or acknowledging me, significantly reduces my productivity and the quality of my work, it always has. That delicate balance necessary for acknowledging another's truth, being present and staying centered within myself, has always been elusive. The ideas detailed within this writing, ring true to me, though I still do not understand how all of this can be accomplished at one time.

The woman I have become sprang from a child with an abusive past. There were three survival mechanisms I put in place within my personality, to accomplish this; I put all others around me first, their truth was of the utmost importance. My truth and my needs could be taken care of with the second survival mechanism, solitude. Thirdly, I stopped trusting my own thoughts and instincts. For the brutal truth others showed me to be true, I must be wrong, ugly, stupid, unkind and ungrateful. Those around me knew best. What I knew or thought was wrong. These things combined made it easy to accept any kind of treatment.

So here these words speak of working together. How a group can work as a whole and allow the individual to flourish at the same time. Once again, I grapple with uncertainty. Religion, "an interest, a belief, or an activity that is very important to a person or group", with its bloody history, warns me of the dangers of coming together open as a group. Though in this writing, the group is to "Speak your truth" and "Suspend judgement", along with many other pretty phrases, but in the end, it is a group of humans bearing their souls. What does history speak of this?

So alone I write of my concerns and completely agree with the ideals. Though I know that with a group of human beings these lofty ideals are impossible to achieve. Alone, they are simple, but in a group, impossible. Especially in a group not of my own choosing.

So I have presented myself, naked and alone, to become part of a group. To learn to acknowledge my own truth at the same time as another's, without judgement.  To remain present to my own thoughts and another's, extend and receive welcome, listen deeply, no fixing, identify assumptions, respect silence, maintain confidentiality, turn to wonder and slow down…… All of this I can do half of. By myself I can extend these courtesies to me. In a group I can extend them to others. To balance both at once in a group of people will be a learning experience for me. Maybe I will find my individual voice comfortably amongst others. We will see.